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IELTS writing 연습. General Training 본문

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IELTS writing 연습. General Training

(gguro) 2016. 3. 29. 14:31



IELTS writing 연습. General Training.


IELTS를 봐야하는 상황이 되어서, writing 연습을 하는 중이다. reading, listening, speaking, writing이 있는데 가장 까다로운 것이 writing이다. 한 시간 안에 두 가지 Task에 대해 써내면 된다. 필자가 연습 중인 IELTS 종류는 General Training 이다.



IELTS writing 연습




백번 듣는 것 보다, 한 번 해보는 게 낫다는 생각에 시간을 정하고 실제로 써 보았다.



Writing 연습에 사용한 IELTS 교재




1.


Task 1 


You should sped no more than 20 minutes on this task.


An Australian colleague is going to your country for a conference. He/She will spend several days in your home  town, and has written a letter to you asking for advice about things to see and do there.


Write a letter to the colleague suggesting what he/she should see and do while he/she is in your home town.


You should write at least 150 words.

You do NOT need to write your own address.




Dear Daniel, 


It is nice to hear that you are visiting Seoul for a conference. And I was happy when you asked me to give some advice about what to see and do there.


  Seoul is a modern city with a lot of advanced features while keeping its historical trace. So I hope you can enjoy both the modern and historical aspects.


  Coex is the best place to see the modern life of Seoulites. It is a huge shopping centre with a movie theatre, fashion cloths shops, toy shops, and various restaurants. There are many things you can see, and experience. The best way to go there is by subway.


  Gyeongbokgung is the best choice to have a glimpse of the historical aspect. It is a palace of Joseon dynasty which lasted for 500 years. You will see the throne where kings used to sit on.


  If you still have time after you tasted both the modern and historical flavors, then it may be good idea to go to N-Seoul tower to look around the whole city. You can have a nice view of the city with the Hangang river which flows through it.


  I wish all the best on your trip to my hometown. 


Kind regards,

Yongsop



자체교정 (사전, 인터넷 참조)


Dear Daniel, 


It is nice to hear that you are visiting Seoul for a conference. And I was happy when you asked me to give some advice about what to see and do there.


  First of all, Seoul is a modern city with a lot of advanced features while keeping its historical trace. So I hope you can enjoy both the modern and historical aspects.


  Coex is the best place to see the modern life of Seoulites. It is a huge shopping centre with a movie theatre, fashion clothes shops, toy shops, and various restaurants. There are many things you can see, and experience. You can see a lot of people are moving around enjoying their city life. The best way to go there is by subway.


  Gyeongbokgung is the best choice to have a glimpse of the historical aspect. It is a palace of Joseon dynasty which lasted for 500 years. You will see the throne where kings used to sit on.


  Additionally, if you still have time after you tasted both the modern and historical flavors, then it may be good idea to go to N-Seoul tower to look around the whole city. You can have a nice view of the city with the Hangang river which flows through it.


  I hope these suggestions have been helpful. I wish all the best on your trip to my hometown. 


Kind regards,

Yongsop



평가 (교정 전 답안 기준)


날맡 수: 208


- Content

1. Have I done what the question asked me to do?

Yes. 한국 여행에서 무엇을 보고 해야하는지 잘 설명했다.


2. Is it the right length?

Yes. 150 낱말 이상이라는 기준에 211 낱말 씀.


3. Have I included all the necessary information? 

Yes. 


4. Is it written in the correct style?

Yes. 직장 동료에게 보내는 형식으로 적절하다.


- Organisation

1. Is it easy to read?

Yes. 읽기 쉽다.


2. Have I presented my ideas and/or information in a logical order?

Yes. 현대적인 면과 역사적인 면으로 나누어서 순서대로 설명.


3. Is it divided into appropriate paragraphs?

Yes. 한 문단에 하나의 주제를 담았다.


4. Have I used linking words correctly?

No. 좀 더 다양한 linking words 를 적절한 곳에 쓸 필요가 있다.


- Language

1. Have I used a variety of sentence structures?

No. 좀 더 다양한 문장 구조를 사용할 필요가 있다.


2. Are the sentences grammatically accurate?

Yes. 문법적으로 틀린 곳은 눈에 띄지 않는다.


3. Is the spelling and punctuation correct?

No. "clothes"를 "cloths"라고 씀.


4. Is there a range of vocabulary?

No. modern, historical 등의 같은 어휘가 반복되어서 단조롭다.



교재의 예시 답안


Dear Dr. Milson,


  Thank you for your letter.I was very pleased to hear you will be visiting Jakarta and hope the following information will help you to enjoy your stay.


  First of all, Jakarta is a big and busy city, the centre of government and business. There are many international quality hotels and restaurants as well as shopping centres, markets and entertainment places.


  However, I think you would like to see some places that are unique to my country. I know you are interested in art and history so firstly I suggest you visit Monas, which is the Independence monument. Secondly, not far from Monas you can find the National Museum which has a large collection of art, textiles and other cultural items.


  Other interesting places are a 'wayang' museum, which features our unique shadow-puppet dramas, and Pasar Ikan (the fish market) where you can see traditional fishing boats.


  I hope these suggestions have been helpful. As you only have a short time in Jakarta, you probably will not be able to do much more sightseeing. But if I can help in any other way, please let me know.


Yours sincerely,


Ari








  

  



2. 

Task 2


You should spend no more than 40 minutes on this task.


As part of a class assignment you have been asked to write about the following topic.


In Western countries, people spend a lot of money on their pets. They buy special food for their cats or dogs, buy them toys and often pay high fees for medical treatment. Some people think this is a waste of money, and argue that pets are dirty and dangerous.


What are the advantages and disadvantages of having a pet? Do people spend too much money on pets?


Give reasons for your answer.


You should write at least 250 words.




It is easy to see that people in Western countries spend much money on their cats or dogs. They look after their pets by providing them high quality nutrition, expensive toys, and medical treatment. It is often pointed out by some people that the amount of money spent on the pets should be reduced, and pets can cause hygiene and violation problems. Here, I will discuss what are the advantages and disadvantages when people have a pet, and show my opinion on the financial aspect of it.


  The most advantage of having a pet is having a friend. Dogs are good friends of people. We have good feeling when we play with dogs. People can relax and feel better when they spend time with their pets.


  Disadvantages of having pets is using limited resources on them. To support their food and health care, we need to spend some money every month. Another disadvantage of it is the pet owners are limited in their activities. For example, when they go to restaurant, shops, or travel far, they always find a good way to take care of their pets since in many cases pets are not allowed to be in public places.


  People spend money on pets' food, cloths, hairs, toys, baths, and health. Quite often they spend a lot of money. I do not think that is a problem as long as they can financially able to do so. Its  basically the decision of pet owners and to be responsible to their pets by spending enough money is much better than to be irresponsible to let their pets be in a miserable situation.


  In conclusion, taking benefits and paying money for having pets is the owners' decision to make and I do not see any problem to spend much money on their pets as far as they are capable to do so.



자체교정 (사전, 인터넷 참조)


It is easy to see that people in Western countries spend much money on their cats or dogs. They look after their pets by providing them high quality nutrition, expensive toys, and medical treatment. It is often pointed out by some people that the amount of money spent on the pets should be reduced, and pets can cause hygiene and violation problems. Here, I will discuss what are the advantages and disadvantages when people have a pet, and show my opinion on the financial aspect of it.


  One of tThe most great advantage of having a pets is having a that they are good friends of human. Dogs are good friends of people. We have good feeling when we play with dogs pets. People can relax and feel better when they spend time with their pets.


  A dDisadvantages of having pets is using limited resources on them. To support their food and health care, we need to spend some money every month. Another disadvantage of it is the pet owners are limited in their activities. For example, when they go to restaurant, shops, or travel far, they always need to find a good way proper solution on taking to take care of their pets since in many cases pets are not allowed to be in public places.


  People spend money on pets' food, clothes, hairs, toys, baths, and health. Quite often they spend a lot of money. I do not think that is a problem as long as they can are financially able to do so. It's basically the decision of pet owners and to be responsible to their pets by spending enough money is much better than to be irresponsible to let their pets be in a miserable situation.


  In conclusion, taking benefits and paying costs money for having pets is the owners' decision to make and I do not see any problem to on spending much money on their pets as far as they are capable to do so.



평가 (교정 전 답안 기준)


날맡 수: 311


- Content

1. Have I done what the question asked me to do?

Yes. 애완동물을 키우는 것의 장단점을 설명함.

No. 사람들이 애완동물에 돈을 많이 쓰는가?에 대해 많이 써도 상관 없다고 답했다. 많이 쓰는지 아닌지에 대한 직접적인 답은 아닌 셈.


2. Is it the right length?

Yes. 250 낱말 이상이라는 기준에 311 낱말 씀


3. Does my essay contain some good ideas and opinions which are relevant to the question?

Yes. 사람과 친구가 된다는 점, 주인의 활동에 제약이 생긴다는 점 등.


4. Have I supported my ideas and opinions with examples?

Yes. 식당, 공공장소 등에서 제약이 따른다는 예를 들었다. 


- Organisation

1. Is it easy to read?

Yes. 읽기 쉽다.


2. Have I presented my ideas and/or information in a logical order?

Yes. 장점, 단점, 사용하는 돈의 순서로 설명.


3. Is it divided into appropriate paragraphs?

Yes. 한 문단에 하나의 주제를 담았다.


4. Have I used linking words correctly?

No. 좀 더 다양한 linking words 를 적절한 곳에 쓸 필요가 있다.


- Language

1. Have I used a variety of sentence structures?

No. 좀 더 다양한 문장 구조를 사용할 필요가 있다.


2. Are the sentences grammatically accurate?

No. 문법적으로 틀린 곳이 몇 군데 있다.


3. Is the spelling and punctuation correct?

No. "clothes"를 "cloths"라고 씀.


4. Is there a range of vocabulary?

No. "having a pet"이 반복된다. 다른 표현을 찾지 못했다.



교재의 예시 답안


In many Western homes people keep a dog or cat or some other kind of pet. While this does involve some expense in terms of good food and medical treatment, there are still many advantages to keeping a pet.


  First of all, pets are good companions. This is especially important for people who live alone and for older people who do not go out much. Some pets can also help to protect the house from thieves. Secondly, dogs and cats like to play and can give hours of amusement to children and adult. Taking care of an animal also helps children to develop responsible attitudes and to learn about nature. Finally, the actual expense of keeping an animal is not that high, and they can eat the leftovers of family meals.


  Some people claim pets are dirty. I don't think this is altogether true. Responsible pet owners keep their pets clean and healthy so they do not smell bad. People also say that some pets, like large dogs, can be dangerous. There have been cases of dogs attacking and seriously injuring small children. However, these cases are uncommon and are the result of bad owners. These people don't train their dogs properly or actually encourage them to be aggressive. So, the problems of pets being unclean and dangerous are in fact the problems of the owners, not the pets themselves. 


  To sum up, there are more advantages than disadvantages to keeping a pet, especially for lonely people and children. In most cases, therefore, the cost is justified.





총평


다 쓰고나니 시간은 10분 정도 남았는데, 고치기가 귀찮아서 그냥 두었다. 다시 보니 고칠 곳이 매우 많았고, 사전을 찾아보니 잘못 알고 있는 것도 꽤 있었다. 낱말 수는 편하게 쓰면 크게 문제는 없는 것 같다.


2016년 3월 29일



@ 솔직히 교재의 예시답안도 그다지 마음에 들지 않는다. 특히 Task 2. 




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